GAR 82 | Healing Our Wounds

 

Allyson Roberts is a highly sought-after intuitive guide, healer, and transformation coach who is a Cognitive Behavioral Expert with a global reach and over 25 years of experience. She is the creator of Personalized Science, a system that combines science and spirituality. Her mission is to show others how the brain keeps us prisoners to the past, and more importantly, teaches the tools to break out of unhealthy life patterns and cycles. The author of three books, Allyson’s newest, titled Behind the Power: Raw Courage to Triumph Over Challenges and Connect with What’s Possible, brings together an authentic, profound compilation of women’s voices. Each of these women faced a life-changing crossroads and each outcome, while different, has one common denominator – trusting in the Universe. Allyson has been featured on major networks, radio broadcasts, newspapers, podcasts, on both live and virtual stages, and more, including Grief and Rebirth Podcast!

IN THIS EPISODE, YOU’LL HEAR ABOUT THINGS LIKE: 

  • What led Allyson to put her son up for adoption 
  • Personalized Science – Allyson’s system that combines science and spirituality 
  • The tools Allyson uses to help people break out of these unhealthy patterns and cycles 
  • Unapologetic Power – Allyson’s program that helps people shift into happier, calmer, and more loving human beings 
  • Spirituality is not just outside of us but also within us 

 

SOME QUESTIONS IRENE ASKS ALLYSON: 

  • How does the brain keep us imprisoned? 
  • What are the cognitive behavioral systems that can help us connect more deeply with our souls? 
  • Can you tell us about your take on trauma and how we heal it? 

Listen to the podcast here

 

Allyson Roberts: It’s Our Responsibility As Co-creators To Heal Our Wounds. Why? So That We Don’t Bleed On Those Who Haven’t Cut Us

 

 

 

 

 

I truly hope this finds each of you so very well. I’m speaking to you from my studio in West Orange, New Jersey. I am delighted to have this opportunity to interview the highly sought-after intuitive guide, healer and transformation coach, Allyson Roberts. Allyson will be speaking to us from Atlanta, Georgia. Allyson is a cognitive behavioral expert with a global reach and many years of experience. She has been featured on major networks, radio, broadcast, newspapers and podcasts on both live and virtual stages.

She is featured on the show as the creator of Personalized Science, a system that combines science and spirituality. Allyson’s mission is to show others how the brain keeps us prisoners through the past and, more importantly, teach us the tools to break out of unhealthy life patterns and cycles. Allyson wants to show people how they are the power source for their life and with the help of their spiritual team, they can become the most powerful version of themselves. Stay tuned because you’re going to learn how to become the most powerful version of yourself.

The author of three books, Allyson’s newest titled Behind the Power: Raw Courage to Triumph Over Challenges and Connect with What’s Possible hit the Amazon bestseller list at its debut. The book brings together an authentic, profound compilation of women’s voices. Each of these women faced a life-changing crossroads and chose to follow her inner voice, strength and bravery. Each outcome, while different, has one common denominator, trusting in the universe.

I’m looking forward to interviewing Allyson about the importance of becoming the boss of our brain, her program called Unapologetic Power and her book titled Behind the Power: Raw Courage to Triumph Over Challenges and Connect with What’s Possible with its refreshing take on trauma and how to finally heal it. This interview has the potential to be an illuminating guide for each of our personal journeys toward rebirth.

Allyson, a very warm and heartfelt welcome to the show.

It’s so great to be here. I’m so excited.

I know we’re going to have a great time. Let’s start with this question. Please tell us about the childhood abuse, abandonment and later adult abuse that inspired you to help others understand that we are powerful beyond our circumstances.

The childhood abuse was rough. It started in my mother’s womb. She tried to abort me because I was the child of an affair that she had with a minister who had one of the largest churches in Atlanta at the time. The abortion didn’t take because I’m sitting here.

You were meant to be with us.

I didn’t feel that way for my entire childhood but I do now. At the age of 56, I can finally say that I am supposed to be here for sure. My dad was absent, not my biological father but the man who was my mom’s husband. He was pretty much absent my entire childhood. I would learn at the age of 42 that I’m not his biological child so it explained a lot of why he wasn’t emotionally available to me. He loved me dearly but wasn’t there. My mother is a raging narcissist. We were beaten and emotionally abused. We were deprived and neglected.

Who is we? You had siblings also?

Yes, I had siblings that trumped through this war alongside me but my mother pitted us against each other. We are estranged. It’s very sad. I always tell everybody we have two states of being, which are disempowered or empowered. When you’re a child and you’re going through daily abuse because this wasn’t every once in a while, this was daily abuse, it was very bad. You feel very disempowered.

One of the main reasons that I do the work that I do is that, first of all, adult survivors of child abuse, there is PTSD involved with that. Also too, there’s no magic flip that switches when we turn 18, 20, 25, 30 or 35 where the abuse stops because we are adults. We are still their children so therefore, the child abuse continues.

Adult survivors of child abuse develop PTSD. There’s no magic flip that switches when they get older, where the abuse stops. They are still children, and so the child abuse continues. Share on X

Your inner child is still inside of you too.

I’m on TikTok. I have about three million views on all of my videos. People can find me there and watch the whole story. The point that I had to come to finally was cutting her off. My father died in 2017.

Your natural father or your stepfather?

My stepfather. He and I made amends before he left this earth. My biological father died from COVID. I tracked him down and he was very abusive as well. It was this triad of abuse from these parents who were “supposed to love me.” It can mess you up.

That’s because you’ve internalized the message that you’re not lovable or worthy.

I trademarked the word shilt. I don’t know if you knew that or not but it’s the combination of shame and guilt. You go around in this shilted state of shame. You’re like, “There’s inevitably something wrong with me. There has to be.” There is also the guilt that you can never make a good decision or ever do anything. When you’re in abuse, that’s what your parent convinces you every single day, every minute and every breath that you breathe through your body that you are bad and you do everything wrong. You’re in this state of shilt. It takes a lot of work to get out of.

You’re not kidding. That takes a lot of internal work. Weren’t you also abandoned where you were living in your car for a while?

Yes.

I was like, “How much more?”

I found the guy that I thought was the love of my life. I ran out of gas in my little Volkswagen on the side of the road. He drove in his pickup truck, rescued me and filled up my car. We were inseparable after that. I moved in with him. He put a ring on my finger. We were engaged to be married and then I failed a pregnancy test.

I went to him. At first, he was so excited. He was trolling me around. We stayed up for the whole night saying, “Is it a boy? Is it a girl? What do you think,” and the whole thing. He then told his dad and the second he told his dad, it changed everything. I was given a check to go to an abortion clinic. For those of you that are reading, I am 10,000% pro-choice. I’m going to say it out loud. I believe it’s a woman’s body and a woman’s choice.

For me, I couldn’t go through with it because we had conceived this baby in love. I was in love with him and his child. I couldn’t do it so I left the abortion clinic and lied, which was wrong. I told my fiancé that I’d gone through with the abortion. A week later, I started throwing up. I had to confess to him that I was still pregnant. That’s when everything fell apart. He kicked me out. He and his dad changed the locks on the doors. It gets worse.

I called my crazy mother from a payphone and begged her for me to please come home while I was trying to figure some things out. I was in college and was working full-time so I went home to live with her. When she heard me vomiting one day, she figured out that I was pregnant. I went to school. I went to campus and came home and she changed the locks.

I heard this voice. You know about the voices. You know that when you hear the voices, it’s the divine spirit unless it’s telling you to do something crazy. This voice was very divine. This voice told me, “Drive to school, park your car in the warmest part of the garage that you can find and go to sleep.” I went back to campus and went into the parking garage. I went down to the basement level. I found the warmest corner of the garage I could find and parked my car. That is exactly where my car stayed for three weeks until I was rescued from it.

How did you get rescued from it?

One of the professors at college realized that I was living in my car because I was going to class in the same clothes day after day. He started watching me and told his wife about me. She was like, “Go back to that garage and get that girl out of that car.” Thank God for her. God rest both of their souls. They are not here on this planet anymore. They rescued me and got me in touch with Catholic Social Services. Things smoothed out a little bit after that.

You finally found some people who would be supportive of you and not think that you were contaminated in some way or horrible. It’s unbelievable. You also have a heart-wrenching story that led you to put your son up for adoption. There was an amazing synchronistic way you found your way back to him 24 years later. You felt that you had to put your son up for adoption.

I was in college. I quit my job after Catholic Social Services. I was malnourished and exhausted. They convinced me to take a leave from school, quit my job, breathe and get into therapy. They saved my life. I changed my whole degree because of that whole experience. I placed my son for adoption. It was a closed adoption.

It must have hurt you so much because of how much you wanted this child.

I tell everybody it was the most heart-wrenching thing I’ve ever been through in my entire life but it’s so beautiful and such a miracle at the same time because there were so many big miracles that happened the whole time that I was pregnant with him and going through that whole process. It was a closed adoption, which means that I knew nothing about his parents and they knew nothing about me. When I was in the hospital, the night that I was having to sign the adoption papers, I was screaming into my hospital pillow.

I would go down to the chapel, sit there and sob until I thought my eyeballs were going to come out of their sockets. I would walk back down to my hospital room thinking that I was calm and then I would be screaming into my pillow again and would be walking back down the chapel. I wasn’t suicidal so I don’t mean that I was going to kill myself but I didn’t want to be here anymore. I was like, “God, I do not know what to do. You’ve led me through this whole process. You gave me all these different miracles. I’m begging you. I don’t know what to do.”

I heard the same voice again who told me to drive to campus and park my car. It said to me, “Allyson.” It spoke my name. For those of you who’ve never had that experience of divine speaking your name, not only does it get your attention but it chills you to your bone marrow. It got my attention and I was still. The voice was like, “If you sign the papers, you’ll see him again.” I was like, “It’s a close adoption. That doesn’t make any sense.” The voice kept saying it over and over and then I picked up the pen.

It’s like with me. You got the message and went with it.

I went with it. I signed the adoption papers. 24 years later, it was the middle of the night and I felt my whole bed shake. That voice was like, “Allyson, it’s time.” I knew exactly what it meant. I didn’t question it because I knew. When I placed my son for adoption, there was no internet. There was nothing. Here I am, 24 years later, I pull up my laptop at 2:00 in the morning. I pull up Catholic Social Services. The phone number is there, the person’s name is there and everything.

As soon as they opened that morning, I called them. They were like, “We’re so sorry. We’ve had this happen so many times. We have to tell you it’s going to take decades.” She was discouraging. I was like, “I don’t care. Tell me the money I need to pay and all the things that I need to do.” I did everything that she said. I faxed my paperwork in. That was at 9:00 in the morning. At 12:30, the same day, my phone rang and it was Catholic Social Services. The woman on the other end was crying. She had already told me that morning, “If you hear back from us quickly, it probably means that we found a death certificate.” She’s crying and I burst into tears.

You think he’s gone.

She could barely speak. She was like, “He’s not dead.” I was like, “What is it?” She’s like, “You faxed your paperwork in at the same time to find one another.”

How astounding and fabulous. Are you talking about there being no divine plan and synchronicities?

It’s so incredible. The way that they saw it was his birthday and then on my paperwork, his birthdate. On his paperwork, it was like, “Do you know the hospital you were born in? Where was your child born? It’s a male.” All of a sudden, they were like, “It has to be this.”

What is your relationship with him?

God kept his comment. I saw him again. I was at his wedding, which is the whole reason that he wanted to find me and I said that I could be at his wedding. We are Facebook friends. We don’t see each other. We don’t talk. That wasn’t the promise.

You know he is okay and you have a connection with him.

I trust God for that. People will go, “That’s so sad.” I’m like, “It’s not. That wasn’t the promise. The promise was that I would see him,” and I did.

For you who had been made to believe that you were so invisible to so many people, you were not invisible to him. He wanted to find you. That’s so important and special. That’s a beautiful story.

Thank you.

It’s amazing. Would you like to describe Personalized Science, your system that combines science and spirituality and explain how the brain keeps us prisoned since you’ve gone through all this and you’ve done so much healing and have discovered so much for yourself? Tell us about Personalized Science, how the brain keeps us prisoners to the past and reveals how each of us, which is important, can become the boss of our brain.

You have to become the boss of your brain if you’re going to change your life.

What does that mean? In other words, is it when certain negative thoughts come through, you go, “No.” What does that mean?

Let me explain Personalized Science because you ask me to and then it will make more sense. I’m a science freak. Cognition is how the brain works. The way that the brain works is a circumstance happens outside of us and we have millions of thoughts about it instantly. Most of them are subconscious thoughts. We don’t even know what we’re thinking. We have feelings. We are glad, mad, sad or afraid. Those are the four basics of what I call feeling groups.

We act on how we feel, which gives us a result. People are like, “Explain it.” You wake up in the morning and don’t like the way that your breath is. Your breath is the circumstance. You think, “I need to brush my teeth.” That makes you feel better. You go into the bathroom and brush your teeth. The result is your breath is better and your mouth feels amazing. You go on with your day. That is cognition and we do it every single day automatically like robots.

The way to become the boss of your brain is let’s say that you’ve used a manual toothbrush your whole life and you’re at a dentist appointment and the dentist is like, “Throw away all of your manual toothbrushes. I want you to use an electric toothbrush.” We have to get on board with that. Some people will be like, “I’m going to do it because the dentist said it.”

There are those of us who are the rebels who are like, “I’ve used the same toothbrush for 29 years. I’m using the same toothbrush. That’s stupid.” There are other people who are critical thinkers naturally who are like, “That’s interesting. I wonder how I’m going to make that transition. What are the benefits? What are this and that?” Those critical thinkers are a very small percentage of the universe because most people are either rebels or go-alongers.

Regardless of what category you fall into, you have a core belief system that you developed in your childhood that runs your show until it doesn’t anymore. We have to develop a new paradigm to have a new life. That’s the science part of it. I studied the science part for a long time, leaving the spirituality out of it. I saw how dry and rote it becomes to always think about your brain. When you pull in spirituality with science, it becomes magical. We all have an invisible spiritual team, whether or not it’s loved ones who’ve crossed over, angels, guides, masters, gods or goddesses.

GAR 82 | Healing Our Wounds

Healing Our Wounds: We all have a core belief system that we developed in our childhood that runs our show until it doesn’t anymore. We have to develop a new paradigm in order to have a new life.

You’re bringing in the team to help you.

It all ramps up to this whole new level of passion, happiness, joy and all of the things. People are like, “There’s no such thing as a perfect life.” Who wants that responsibility? I don’t want that responsibility and boredom. It’s not about being perfect. It’s about moving into a life where you’re not creating these patterns over and over and ending up miserable.

In your particular case, when you were found and saved by that professor and his wife, they were the beginnings of you changing your pattern and thinking about yourself in a different way than when you went for healing or therapy. I’m relating to it because, as our audience knows, I had similar tough experiences in my childhood too. I went to healing and all. It’s about learning to re-program how you think to process differently, which opens a whole new world for you. I want to ask you. What’d you end up majoring in? You said you changed your major.

My original major was going to be business management. That’s when I did a 180 in psychology and philosophy.

You answered your calls as the healer you were meant to be. What are the cognitive behavioral systems that can help us connect more deeply with our souls? Can you talk about that?

The system of cognition is, first of all, being willing. You have to be willing to look at the patterns that are keeping you stuck and heal those patterns. A lot of coaches do what I call forward thinking. It’s like, “Don’t worry about all of that stuff. Focus on making $1 million.” Your self-worth equals your self-worth. If your self-worth is in the toilet, your wallet is probably also in the toilet or you have money but you’re not very happy with it and it’s never enough. It comes in and it leaves and all the things because your self-worth is all junked up. Being willing to look at all of that is number one.

Number two is staying curious. It’s like, “What am thinking? How am I feeling?” It is understanding all of that. The third thing is understanding that your subconscious brain has a language. The language of the subconscious brain is, “I don’t know. It’s too hard. I can’t.” If you’re walking around saying, “I don’t know. That’s too hard. I can’t do that,” it is understanding that your reptilian brain is keeping you the same because everything to our reptilian brain that’s different is a threat. The system of cognition is learning these things so that you understand how you function. We are humans but we are also machines. The brain is a machine. Unless you’re brain damaged, everyone’s brain works the same way. It’s learning that process and becoming aware.

GAR 82 | Healing Our Wounds

Healing Our Wounds: The system of cognition is learning these things so that you understand how you function because we are humans, but we are also machines.

As a transformation coach, what are the specific tools you use to help people break out of these unhealthy patterns and cycles? Would you like to share a story about a person whose life you helped to transform? This is wonderful. I know so many people who are so stuck. They don’t understand it’s about changing how they approach things or how they think about things that would make all the difference to them.

I also want to say too that there are a lot of people who do a lot of self-work and are in therapy who are also stuck.

Why do you say that is? I’ve seen that too. Why do you suppose that is?

They don’t have the proper guidance to help them pivot slightly from focusing on the problems all the time to a slight pivot on the possibility. That’s where my system comes in. The very first thing that I have people do is give me a vision for their life. If they’re like, “I don’t know. I can’t. It’s too hard,” I’m like, “That’s because your reptilian brain is ruling you. What if you did know? What if it wasn’t hard? What if you could? What would the vision of your life be?”

People surprise themselves so much when they get out of that frame of thinking. They take the pen, pretend like it’s a magic wand and write down their vision for their life. A lot of times, they don’t even know what they’ve written. We start there. You have to know what the vision of your life is first and be crystal clear about that vision. I teach people how to feel. They’ve come out with a fifth emotion called fawning. I should say that there’s a sixth emotion that I’ll call numb.

You’re teaching me something. I’m so open to learning. Tell us about the emotions. There’s a sixth one that’s new on the screen. Can you tell us about them?

There are four basic emotions. You can think of these basic emotions like when you go to Home Depot and pick up the paint that you’re going to try to find for your bedroom. It’s red but they’re all different shades of red. There’s green but there are all different shades of green. We are glad, which a lot of emotions fall into glad. We are sad, mad and afraid. There is fawning, which is a state of confusion that creates a whole other bag of stuff. The sixth one is numb. We’re robotic numb people. I have to teach people how to feel. I’m like, “Are you blissful? Are you angry?”

They’re not in touch with it though.

Not at all. I am acknowledging that. The next step is to meet ourselves with compassion. It is to look at ourselves as that feral little kitten who is hissing and seems like they’re a real terror but inside, we know that it’s fear. We beat ourselves up 24/7. Most people do. From the time we get up in the morning, we look in the mirror.

We have this critic talking to us all the time.

It’s like, “Your butt looks big in those jeans. You’re so stupid. I can’t believe that you forgot to pay that bill again.” We do it all day long. Introducing compassion to ourselves, people can resonate with that too because I’m not asking them to love or forgive themselves. I’m asking for a little piece of compassion. People get on board with that. Lastly, it’s to commit. In my world and ballgame, commitment is key. It is everything. I’ll ask them, “I’m asking for six months of your life.”

We need to introduce compassion to ourselves. Not love ourselves, not forgive ourselves, but just have a little piece of compassion. Share on X

I’ll share with you very quickly a story. This man, Bruce, came to me. This is a couple of years ago. He was jobless and penniless. He mustered the money together to hire me. He was lost. I said, “Write a vision for your life.” He was like, “Okay.” We had to get to that. You’re going to love this. The vision for his life was he was going to work in a situation where he was loved, seen, heard and respected.

He’s in his 60s. He wants to work in a situation where he sets the rules and makes some money. He wants to make all the things. He wants that his house would be paid for and all of his debt would be wiped clean. A few weeks later, not months, not years, he’s at a party in his neighborhood. He happened to tell this man his situation and what was going on with his home. His neighbor purchased his house for him with no strings attached. He’s in a career that he loves where he sets his pace. He’s seen, heard, respected and loved. He’s done all the things. That part took a little while longer because he did not believe that it could happen.

Especially to him.

My work helps people start believing.

You put him in touch with his feelings and emotions. He was able to be forthcoming with this neighbor. He probably, in the past, would’ve never said anything. 

He would not have said a word.

Tell us about your program called Unapologetic Power. You’re talking about it with this guy. It helps a person shift into a happier, calmer and more loving human being. Can we sprinkle that onto the planet, please?

When I answered the calling to be a group coach and I’m very passionate about what I do, I was like, “I have no idea what I’m doing.” I was one of those coaches that were coaching people from 8:00 in the morning until 9:00 at night. God was like, “I want you to help more people. There’s only one of you.” I started the coaching program. There are 47 people in it. It is always fluctuating because people graduate and leave or people graduate and sign up again. New people are always coming in.

Do you do it online?

It’s online. I have clients all over the world.

Can we talk about the ways to connect with you? Tell people about that because they may be interested.

You can go to my website, AllysonRoberts.com. I always recommend to everyone who wants to try me out that every other month, I have a class that’s called Painless Pivots to Power. It’s $27. It’s the best $27 that you’re going to spend on your life probably ever. I teach you how to believe that you are enough, worthy, lovable and whole. I teach you how to believe that it’s your birthright. We can’t make changes if we don’t believe first. That’s why affirmations don’t work, like when people walk around saying, “I am rich.”

That’s because they don’t believe it. They don’t buy it from deep inside.

Most of our core beliefs are, “I’m going to be rejected. I don’t matter. I’m a disappointment. Everyone abandons me. Life is chaotic. That’s the way it is. I have to control everything to be safe. I’ve got to hold this all together. I’m not enough.” Those are our core beliefs. I teach you how to adopt a whole new set of core beliefs and it works. I don’t know if you know this but Feedspot, for two years running, has awarded me the title of Top 100 Coaches in the World. That’s because they study my work and they know that it works.

When you talk about the spiritual team, do you know specific people, guides or whatever who are on that team? Can you tell people about that? Do we each have a team?

We each have a team.

Are they spiritual guides?

Yeah, guides, teams and everything. I do want to tell people this. I do have atheists who work with me. I believe that spirituality is not just outside of us but also within us. If someone doesn’t believe at all or they’re starting to believe, it’s fine. Here’s the thing. An atheist will laugh when I say this. Your master and guides don’t care if you believe or not. It’s none of their business. They work with you and guide you whether you believe in them or not. That’s how much the universe loves us.

Here’s another question. Your remarkable new book is titled Behind the Power: Raw Courage to Triumph Over Challenges and Connect with What’s Possible. Tell us about your refreshing take on trauma and how we heal it. There are all these people walking around this planet that are traumatized.

The refreshing take on it is that trauma does not have to be this big thing. One of my clients, when she came to me, to make a long story short, it was a mess. That’s the best way to say it. What we came to realize is that the reason that she had so much trauma is that the next-door neighbor girl that she grew up with never wanted to play with her. It took us a while to unearth that.

People compare their trauma. If a shark bit you but I was stung by a jellyfish, then my jellyfish thing doesn’t matter because you’re missing a leg. They discount themselves and say, “My trauma was nothing.” It was. For anyone who may not know the definition of trauma, trauma is any event that changes your view of the world and yourself. The boy in school that didn’t like you, if it made you start changing how you looked at yourself because you’re like, “I must be disgusting. My thighs must be too fat. My hair is not this way or that way,” and all of a sudden, you don’t trust any guys, that’s trauma. That needs to be healed and it can be healed. That’s the other refreshing take on trauma. All trauma is healable.

You’re a walking and living proof of it and so am I. How do you suggest people heal it? Is it a one-size-fits-all or are there different roads to healing for different people or through your program, do you have a special way to help people address their trauma?

I do. I have every walk of life in my group. I have gay people whose parents tried to put them through straight therapy. I have straight people who thought they were gay. I have people of color who were discriminated against. There is everything. Here’s the thing about the program. I base it on how the brain works. Everybody has a brain so therefore, it works for everyone. I base it on your brain, not what you went through.

You base it on what processed the trauma.

What the trauma did to your brain and what you can do to heal that trauma.

You also say that when we heal, it creates a ripple effect in every part of our lives. I know that too. Tell us because this is the kernel or the mission of this show. Of all people, why is it so important for each of us to heal and talk about that ripple effect?

GAR 82 | Healing Our Wounds

Healing Our Wounds: Trauma is any event that changes your view of the world and of yourself.

If you go to a pond, which I encourage all of you to find as quickly as you can, go to a pond and pick up different-sized rocks from big rocks to little bitty pebbles and throw them individually, one at a time, into the water. Here’s the thing. The water has to ripple. It’s the way that it works. The water can’t say, “I’m not going to ripple for Irene’s pebble. I’m only going to ripple for Allyson’s rock.” It has to ripple. That’s because water is energy and so are we. People are energy.

If you are the rock and you throw yourself into the pond of your life, in a healing fashion, you are going to create a ripple effect that is going to carry through generations and every single area of your life from your health, sex life, dating world, married life, financial life, career, your calling, purpose, passion and all the things. When people tell me, “I don’t know that I necessarily believe that,” I say, “What kind of ripple effect has your trauma caused?” They’re like, “Oh.” I’m like, “Healing also causes a ripple effect.”

You’re saying it’s important for each of us to heal so that the ripple effect is a positive effect that goes through society, all the people we touch and all the people who our lives affect.

What happens, and I find this a lot with people, is that they want everyone else to change so that they can finally be happy. While that’s great to think about it and it exists in all the Disney movies, it’s not reality. People do not change to match what we want them to be. If they do, then you’re manipulating them. That’s a very dangerous territory. If you want the people around you to change and treat you better, become better authentically.

If you want the people around you to change and treat you better, become better. You have to change. Share on X

I have experienced that in my family. I did so much healing and changing that there were people who changed. They had a choice. They could have stayed the same but in response, they also did their healing. It’s a beautiful thing. Tell us about your workshops, programs and everything you’ve got planned. Once again, let us know the best way for everybody. It’s AllysonRoberts.com. Tell us all about what you’re doing because I’m sure people are going to want to get involved, sign up and take an opportunity to heal.

I’m so excited because I do a live event every year in Atlanta in October 2023. It’s called Behind the Power. It’s based on my book series. In 2023, the subtitle of Behind the Power is You’re Not Crazy, You’re Powerful because a lot of people think that they’re crazy and they’re not. They’re powerful. We are doing it in Atlanta. If you want to find out more information about that, that’s on my website.

I also encourage everyone to sign up for Painless Pivots to Power. Our next one is going to be in May 2023, July 2023 and September 2023. We then go right into the Behind the Power event in Atlanta. You can either come in person or virtually. They’re like, “Why should I come to these events? Why should I join up with Painless Pivots to Power?” The biggest thing I want to tell you is that if you feel like your life is out of alignment and you are truly ready to be in alignment not only with your greater purpose but to be in alignment with your calm and the peace inside of yourself, you need to meet me.

Of all people in the world, what is your tip for finding joy in life? Is it about healing?

When I find my joy cup running a little empty, I love to put my grandson in my lap, look into his beautiful eyes and remind myself that I am a cycle breaker and that he will never in a million years ever have to even know what it feels like to grow up in the environment that I grew up in because I broke that cycle with my daughter.

Allyson and I were talking before our interview. I so relate to everything Allyson is saying because I did all this healing from my trauma also. I have a son. Everything is like what you’re saying with your daughter. I changed all those patterns and I see it in my grandchildren. They will never have to struggle with those issues that I did. It’s such a joy.

I’ve had moms and dads come to me where their kids are already grown and either they went through some kind of addiction or maybe they didn’t leave a dysfunctional spouse and take the kids. They’re like, “It’s too late.” It is never too late. I have to say that so powerfully from my heart space. I have seen my clients go back to their adult children and authentically apologize. There is a way to ask for forgiveness and there’s a way to not ask for forgiveness. They go through our system in Unapologetic Power and go back to those grown children and authentically ask for forgiveness. Years of big mess go poof. It’s incredible to witness that.

It must be so wonderful for you over and over again to see with all that you’ve been through and all the ways you’ve healed how many people you are helping to heal and how many people’s lives you’re touching and affecting. I have the same experience with this show.

I jump out of bed. I also do one-on-one sessions inside my group program. Every single day, I’m meeting one-on-one with these amazing what I call magic makers because that’s what they turn into. It’s so amazing.

It’s so wonderful. I’m so glad to meet you and know about your work. You have an insightful quote that I especially resonate with because it speaks directly to the healing mission of the show. That is, “It’s our responsibility as co-creators to heal our wounds. Why? It is so we don’t bleed on those who haven’t cut us.” How profound, Allyson.

In that spirit, I want to thank you for the transformative healing work you are contributing to our world by helping people shift into happier, more loving, authentic and powerful human beings. I also thank you from my heart for this very special interview that has surely illumined many personal journeys toward rebirth. Make sure to follow us and like us on social @IreneSWeinberg on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter and especially on YouTube. Hit like, notify and subscribe and amazing interviews like this one with Allyson will be coming to you. As I like to say, to be continued, many blessings and bye for now.

 

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